Buttocks augmentation is hot in California. Plastic surgeons claim that they can take the fat from another place in the body and graft it into the buttocks.

Our little sheltie queen has two perfectly symmetrical fatty tumors on her rump. Natural augmentation.

The vet is not impressed.

Portia doesn't mind. She struts her stuff like the queen of England complete with a bustle from a couple centuries ago.

The vet wants to biopsy the tumors to ensure they are not malignant.

As I gazed at the queen in my rear view mirror, she was laying regally across the back seat. I thought.

The cost of a needle biopsy? $678

I didn't ask how much the surgery for removal would be. I rest assured that it would be in the thousands.

Portia will be nine in October. She is active and her movement is uninhibited. She is happy...well except when I left her at the vet's for the afternoon. Then she howled mercilessly in their kennel for most of the afternoon.

The hospital is not for a queen.

Anyway, fatty tumors are generally not malignant according to the internet. The vet didn't share this with me...but then again he is in the business of treating animals. In all fairness, I am sure the only way to tell is to biopsy, but then what would I do with the information? If she if fine, I lose $678. If not, then I have to live with my decision not to have surgery.

Thus I have decided ignorance is bliss.

The queen will continue to rule as long as her days.